Mother's Day from the Perspective of a Single Father

When I took on the responsibility of raising my daughter full time five years ago, I didn't know anything about raising a child independently.  The learning came fast and hard.  There were changes that I needed to make mentally, socially, career-wise, etc.  I received all sorts of feedback from men (saying we won) to women (either applauding my move or seemingly upset because my daughter resided with me).  The two things on the top of my mind were 1.  The judge asking was I ready and 2. My mother reminding me that men in my family took care of their children.  I was nervous and had to make my next move my best move.  So I prayed and asked God for guidance and grace.

I was blessed with a team of women (friends and family) that helped ease my transition.  I was thrust into the position of setting hair appointments, doctor appointments, dentist appointments, school registration, etc.  The support of those women got me through the transitional curve.  What I began to realize is motherhood is tough.  Women have been managing the house, school, and supporting their men while at times either pursuing their own goals or sacrificing their goals for the greater good of the family.  I'm a firm believer in studying and learning from others, so I began paying close attention to single mothers (since I'm a single dad), and my appreciation for what they've been accomplishing for generations has me in awe.

In the courtroom, I told the judge that it's my responsibility to raise my child.  I'm a firm believer in that.  I also believe it takes two parents (mom and dad) to raise a child.  Optimally they would do it together, but at the very least co-parenting, unfortunately, it seems we have an epidemic of single parents in households these days.  After one year of being a single father, someone told me Happy Mother's Day.  I said thank you, but inwardly I said I'm not her mother.  As much of me she is, she's just as much her mother.  It's not my role to attempt to replace her mother.  I'm supposed to raise her to be courteous, respectful, curious, intelligent, and courageous among other things.  I'm also supposed to create a space for her to know, spend time with, and appreciate her mother because she's a combination of us both.

This Mother's Day I appreciate and applaud the women that have nurtured, feed, and encouraged generations.  Hopefully, this mothers day has left you full of love.  Enough love to give you the strength you need to continue to be the mother's this society needs to reach its full potential.